Monday = More Crap

My wife has already missed several days of school. The kids did all get pretty sick for a few days while I was on jury duty and I guess she did too. I think she has missed a few more than necessary but that’s just me.

I don’t know who to get more frustrated with, my wife or my sister-in-law? My wife signs up for the M-F, 8-4, 1-year cosmetology course and I get about 5 days notice. She asks her sister if she can pick up the kids 4 days a week from school for the next year and of course she says “Sure! No problem!”

Now I’m sure she won’t make it a whole year in school (I really wish she could) but I doubt it. Even taking 15 hours of college credits doesn’t require that kind of time commitment. Sure you finish and graduate in a year but I just don’t think she’s ready. My sister-in-law commits to anything and everything and is only capable of taking on so much. She now has a baby of her own to boot. Now three weeks into it she is complaining everyday. Didn't see that one coming... not.

My wife’s last live in guy friend is gone and now replaced by a woman whom I believe is also going to school with my wife, I’m really not sure. I guess we went to high school together but I really don’t remember her, it was a big school. Now that he is gone though, every time the kids are over her place it just seems like too much.

She just about passed up on Tuesday night last week, her usual night to have the kids but I was too busy with soccer and conference calls, I needed the night off. Then I tried to get her to take them Friday, then Saturday with no luck either night. She said she would take them Sunday but never called. She has been busy I guess with a new crowd. I have no idea what sort of crowd either, could be good or bad. Today, I asked her to take our daughter to gymnastics but that just about did her in. “Nobody talks to her or tells her anything.”, “She has to drive all over **%& town and waste her gas.”, “It’s just my school, it’s not like I don’t have a ton of homework!”

Obviously I’m just wayyyy too pushy.

Fej

Technologically Deprived Children

After peeling myself out of bed this morning I did manage to still make several of my locally famous tortilla omelets. They went over really well.

We needed to go shopping today for jeans. Multiple kids in my household are going through them like paper napkins so we headed off to the mall. I have been somewhat distracted of late, I can’t seem to shake the stupid trial. So our first stop was the school where the teacher was killed.

My kids knew about the basic details of the trial and I had mentioned to them that I couldn’t visit the school until the trial was over. We dropped by today since it’s near the mall. It was completely different than I expected but all at the same time it became exactly the same place that has been occupying my mind for the last month. We just drove around it and I pulled into the parking lot and gazed around. My kids didn’t really ask a lot of questions except they were surprised at first when I told them that the portable classroom she was killed in had been taken away. They had never considered what you do with a classroom after something like that happens.

I’ll hold off on visiting the ditch until I’m alone, or at least without my kids.

One of my 8-year-olds many gifts was a portable CD player with headphones. So when we loaded up the vehicle for our outing today, all three were geared up with headphones and CD players, minus my technically deprived son. He has a Walkman tape player he was given by my wife’s neighbor. He only had one cheesy tape but he played it full blast, both sides and didn’t complain a bit. What a trooper, guess what he’s getting for his birthday? More tapes!! Just kidding of course, he’ll get his own CD player too.

And me? I only got complaints about turning down the car stereo because it was too loud. What a bunch of crap.

Fej

Catchy Title

Last night’s beer outing with my good friend was uneventful and fun but we are so mellowing out. I can’t tell you how many times he and I left that very same bar (unfortunately not fit for the road either), both in huge trouble with our wives, way later than we had originally planned, and full well knowing it would be months before we would be allowed to go out again.

Recently, last night included, has not been like that at all. We had a few beers talked about everything like we had just seen each other the day before (it had been a month or two) and after eating we were just about sober. We left on time and still felt like it was a good night out.

Today was my youngest daughter’s 8th birthday and the party was at 1:00 PM. That hour crept up on us rather quickly but everything fell together somehow and turned out well. She has a ton of new crap that doesn’t fit anywhere in this house. Great.

I tried to find a sitter for the kids so I could go to my Jury get together but failed miserably. I wanted them to stay over night somewhere because I also could have made it to a poker party with some of my old friends. Instead of getting a sitter I ended up taking my nephew with us too. Huh. That didn’t quite work out as I had planned.

They did really well at the Jury party. They lasted nearly two hours and didn’t break anything I think. That gave me a little time to get into some pretty interesting discussions of “other” things that went on before, during and after the trial that several of us had not previously heard of. Nothing of course that would have changed our verdict but very interesting stuff all the same.

So instead of a poker party, I have four children systematically destroying the house while I type away in complete denial. It’s good to know they’re having fun though.

Fej

For everyone else:

In no particular order and just because I don’t tend to reply to my own comments all that often, thanks for stopping by:

Julia The Nurse and more.
Kat Good luck with your move.
Crystal Clear From “way” back when.
Faisal My first Blogging friend.
Robyn The most entertaining.
Stan The Man.
Sara and where I link to ShaneMy NM friends.
Woman on the Verge of greatness.
Pensive Ro The Italian...
Evan Whom vicariously live through…
Diva I hope the next chapter and the following are good one’s.
Eden Nuff said.
Ruth She’ll put you in your place, likely where you belong.
Em Friend from the Lonestar state
VicsThe lady on the East side of the Pond.
Tina -Retro Girl
Suzzanne Contemplating greatness
Christie We’ll talk soon!
JinI’ll need a lawyer one of these days.
Trisha Rocks!
Heather Another good Mom.
Bulllet Very entertaining
Abby Taylor Gotta read….
Noala From down under.
Melinda Martini’s…
FoFuSa Ha! She is hilarious.
Panther Girl Read her blog, every day, it’s great stuff.

This is most of what I read daily and most of those who stop by my blog. I'm sure I've missed a few at least, please leave a nasty comment, I deserve it for leaving you off.

Have a good weekend everyone.


Fej

Cute will only get you so far...

My youngest daughter turns 8 this Saturday. I have had to threaten her with canceling her birthday party as a last resort to her being an ornery little brat all week. Seriously, she has been in rare form. Last weekend she was sick and might have had an excuse but she wasn’t acting this way. By Monday (no school either) she was doing much better health wise. Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday morning though, she has been a complete grump. She flat out refuses to do anything I say until I completely lose it. Then she’s a sobbing mess and instead of coming around eventually she just goes right back to being a grump. She pulled it with my sister too on Wednesday evening.

Bedtime has been officially changed as of tonight (earlier) and all of her clothes are set out for the next morning too. This had better be a little phase because I’m not going to put up with it anymore.

Big, deep, breaths.

I got the email today! Yup, my interview is officially rescheduled for the 8th of March and I can hardly wait. I’m nervous no doubt but not nearly as much as I was originally. Having it rescheduled has given me more time to contemplate things, prepare mentally, and what was originally hesitant thought about leaving my current job has been replaced with desperate want.

Tomorrow is Friday, my good buddy has a drinking pass for the evening and I really need a drink. Work is going to go by sooooo slowly...

Fej

Time for a new one.

Well, I’m all caught up at work. This interview really needs to go well. If after three weeks of jury duty and I’m all caught up in one day, things must be slow. I think I’m done there. Even if this job interview doesn’t work out, these last three weeks have demonstrated that I’m definitely ready to leave and more so that I’m not near as critically needed as I once was. I’ll keep looking and find something else.

My youngest daughter has been going to gymnastics for the last 5 weeks and today was the first time I could make it to see her. That place is a mad house. She has already been bumped to the intermediate class in her short time there. She has the perfect build for gymnastics. She’s basically a toothpick with hair and she can bend any which way necessary with ease. It doesn’t hurt that she has an overload of energy all the time and is rarely on her feet. She’s typically upside down in an arch, or doing cartwheels and handstands.

When we got home this evening I had a message from one of my fellow jurors. I guess we will be getting together this weekend for a little “end of duty” party. I’ll definitely try to make that.

Fej

Back to Normal(?)

What a day. Our panel regrouped at our usual place in the jury room this morning and then went up to the deliberation room to wait for court to resume. We were a far cry from our usual noisy group. In fact, as everyone gloomily stood around the room the only comments were about our silence. I guess the defendant’s family had taunted one lady the night before as she waited for a ride, which didn’t help anyone’s mood a bit.

Finally, we were called into court. By some miracle, both parties waived the jury for the aggravated charge decision. The judge would take this on for us. He spent some considerable time thanking us for our time, punctuality, and attention to the case. It was one of the longest criminal trials here in recent decades I guess, I don't doubt it. We received certificates of appreciation and then retired to the deliberation room for a voluntary open discussion with the attorneys and judge. That was interesting and resolved some of our open questions and possibly some of theirs. Then I misheard that the defendant’s family wanted to talk to us. I didn’t think that was such a hot idea given that we had just handed down a pretty decisive first-degree murder charge to their son. I was wrong, it was the victim’s family that wanted to speak with us.

The lawyers and grief counselors talked them out of it and sent a representative instead to express their gratitude. That would have been way too emotional for them, much less us. During the reading of the verdict yesterday afternoon, literally the entire courtroom burst into tears. The defendant’s family of course because of the guilty verdict and the victim’s family I'm assuming for a mixture of reasons. The judges secretary and the lead detective for the prosecution were both crying so I stopped scanning what had become familiar faces and patiently waited to leave the courtroom.



Now I return to the private sector once again, I hope. Well, my first phone call out was to my perspective employer to see if he had any recollection of who I was. As it turned out, he had apparently had a discussion earlier that morning having learned of the verdict and figured that I would probably be calling soon. He had already talked to HR prior to my call and they are deciding whether my interview will be held on the 8th or the 10th of next month. (Insert cartwheels and loud whooping sounds here.)

Work was a waste, I spent the whole day walking everyone I saw through the whole trial step by step. Damn if feels good to finally be able to talk about it.

Fej

It's Over!!!

We deliberated, delivered a verdict, brought an entire courtroom to tears for varying reasons and we still have to go back tomorrow. I’ve never heard of this before but I guess we will hear additional testimony and even have to deliberate on additional items too.

No one is happy about this at all, from our panel anyway. Today wasn’t fun even though we managed to come to a decision without too much difficulty. We are all well past ready for this to be over.

Now, instead of a stiff drink, I’ll be helping my oldest finish a research paper that I’m sure will take the better part of the night. Maybe tomorrow I'll have that drink.

Fej

Infrared and Little Kids

My six-year-old son and I stop into a restroom in a department store. Upon completing our business I step away from the electronic-eye device and my urinal flushes. He steps away and nothing happens. I notice that he is too short for the eye to see him.

“Son, you are too short for the eye to see you. Wave your hand or something.”

“What eye Dad?” He looks a little confused. He is still looking for a handle to pull on.

“That’s how these toilets work. See the little red light? That’s an electronic eye that flushes automatically when you walk away. Uh, if you are tall enough.”

“Oh.” He starts waving frantically at the red eye.

“No son, you just need to place your hand in front of it for a few seconds and then remove it.”

It works and startles him just a bit. We head over to the sinks, they have the infrared sensors also. He can’t get the water to stay on long enough to wash his hands.

I say, “The sinks have the electronic eye’s too son, just hold your hands underneath and don’t move them too far away.” He can barely reach the faucet but manages to get the soap rinsed off.

Then of course, the paper towel machines also have the eye. I wave my hand and get my towel. He looks at me and then does the same and gets his towel. He walks toward the trashcan, gets ready to toss in his wadded up towel but hesitates, “Dad? Does the trashcan have an eye too?”

It was just an open barrel, poor guy, I didn’t mean to shock him with all this high tech stuff we just needed to use the restroom.

Fej

Stupid Things

Stupid late night Friday soccer games. Who signed me up for this punishment anyhow? Oh...me.

Stupid cats, between the younger two and my dog, there was a major “altercation” late last night. This resulted in loud hissing, barking, and a chase of some sort resulting in a large glass vase being hurtled from the top of the kitchen cabinets to the tile floor. I love cleaning up several pounds of broken glass in the middle of the night.

Stupid jury duty. Actually no, it’s just been a long and difficult trial. I’m taking all of this very seriously and today the closing arguments finished up. On Monday we get our final instructions and after dismissing the alternates we (they, if I’m an alternate) begin deliberations. Today completed the third straight week of this trial.

Stupid colds. I’m still on medication for my sinus’s, my son missed three and a half days of school this week, my oldest is blowing through tissue like crazy, and now my younger daughter is sure to fall next. She is already starting to cough.

Actually, I’m in a pretty good mood. I know this weekend will fly right by but I’ll try to make the most of it. I hope you all have a good weekend too.

Fej

Update

Gad. What a busy couple of days. I just barely got use of my computer again to thanks to a research paper we started for my oldest daughter.

So. Yesterday I got this call from a long time friend of my wife’s. Well, long time up until about last September. They had some sort of a falling out that I never really got the details of until yesterday. I’ve know this woman since meeting my wife 14 or so years ago, so we’ve become good friends over the years as well.

I had seen her while driving on my way to pick up the kids after Jury Duty a week or so ago. I tried calling but she didn’t answer her phone so I left her a message just saying to give me a call one of these days. She called while I was on lunch break and I caught her up on how things have been. She asked how my wife was and about my kids. I wasn’t trying to get any info out of her because I never really suspected there was any. As it turns out, the reason they aren’t speaking is because my wife put the “moves” on a guy this friend was seeing at the time.

For whatever reason, my wife and this guy were left alone together for some period of time and must have hit it off. So, her friend cut off her relationship with both of them. Understandable I suppose. I guess she went so far as to try calling my wife again a few months later to try and patch things up. I guess the guy in question wasn’t anything serious anyway. At the time, my wife was too busy with her new boyfriend of that time and so her friend stopped trying.

While this is a somewhat juicy event in it’s own, what is of more importance is the fact that it took this woman so long to tell me about this. How many other events have occurred like it? Yes, I’m starting to put some pieces of the puzzle together. Once piece that doesn’t fit is why all of these people are afraid to tell me what’s going on? Especially when I usually have a pretty good idea in the first place? Okay, not this time, but usually.

I’m hardly any kind of a threat. Come on, I ground the stuffed animals, not the kids! We are getting a divorce. Do these people think that by telling me she is cheating, I’ll change my mind, we’ll get back together and call it off?



Don’t leave your man alone with my wife, for any reason or any length of time. (Unless less he’s a glutton for punishment and infinitely wealthy.)

Fej

More Stuff to Come

I have a lot to write about tonight. Really I do. I got a call today from someone I haven’t talked to in months. She had some very interesting info that I need to add to my drama files. It really fills in several “gaps” about some of the events that occurred over the last couple months. It would just take so long tonight though. Maybe tomorrow.

I’m extra tired and I’m not feeling all that great still so this and a quiz is all I can squeeze out tonight.

Fej

Yup, a quiz.

I found this over at Melinda's, and I only had to take it 47 times to get the right answer. Only kidding of course, I just don't post it at all if I don't get the right result the first time.

Your Seduction Style: Ideal Lover

You seduce people by tapping into their dreams and desires. And because of this sensitivity, you can be the ideal lover for anyone you seek. You are a shapeshifter - bringing romance, adventure, spirituality to relationships. It all depends on who your with, and what their vision of a perfect relationship is.

What Is Your Seduction Style?

Nasalness

Two kids have been taken down so far by whatever bug they are passing around. I suspect the third won’t make it much longer. I dropped a real grumpy one off at school today a bit depressed about me not being able to linger around like I usually do in the mornings. That and although she wouldn’t admit it, I knew she was missing her partner in crime.

I blasted off towards downtown and our panel was lining up as I walked in the door. The State finally finished up their side today so it’s possible we are on the downhill portion, I’m not going to bet on it though. I could hardly breathe through either nostril for most of our time in court today. That bugged the crap out of me and I’m sure my fellow jurors appreciated all of the lovely additional nasal sounds that accompany this condition too.

So I did go to a walk in clinic tonight. It was good to know that the doc felt I was doing everything right and just needed to step it up a bit, add in some antibiotics, and switch out my allergy meds. I hate taking medication but I’m quite tired of this crap too, so I’ll do it.

Fej

V-Day and Such

First off, Happy Valentines Day to all who stopped by to comment, and to everyone else might appreciate it also (no, not you Stan, Evan, or Shane:)

I did double check today, as I didn’t notice it on Sunday, but yes my wife does still have her nose piercing. I thought momentarily that since, despite being a guy, I hadn’t missed the nose piercing, but in fact that it wasn’t there. Nope, I’m just a guy, it was there, I must have been just hoping.


Damn trial.


Now my son is sick too. He was good this morning but pretty well laid out this afternoon with a fever. I’m not feeling all that great either, I think I’m going to finally wonder into a medical facility and have my silly sinus’s checked into, they are driving me insane.

A short drive by the way...


Fej

Boy's Night In

My son is 6 and has one of those laughs that is so pure and genuine that you usually can’t help but to laugh with him, no matter what gets him started. He has actually cracked up an entire movie theater well after the funny part was over, because he’s laughing so hard afterwards.

For boy’s night, my son and I watched the Humpback of Notre Dame last night, the Disney cartoon version of course. It wasn’t the first time he had seen the movie, but it had been so long it might as well have been. When the goat walks under the big bell after eating a bunch of Quasimoto’s figurines, he burps, and it echoes. My son just about fell off the couch he was laughing so hard and so that got me going too. He had me rewind that part over and over until it wore off on me, but he never wavered.

Don’t give me a hard time about picking a Disney flick for boy’s night, that Esmeralda is pretty hot.

My grandfather is a Shriner so we get tickets for the circus every year. The lure of the circus has long worn off on me, I think I was 11 at the time, but since we missed the last year or two my sister and I hauled all our kids there today. I managed to escape without buying the $8 dollar pieces of crap they try to guilt you into for your screaming kids. I did break down and buy five of the silly glow stick things that just last one night, but they were much cheaper.

Then as I was deeply into my surfing and such, came the realization that it was a school night. Damn. That means it’s also a Juror night. I’m almost, not quite but almost, ready to just go back to work. This stupid trial is starting to screw with me. This weekend, I had dreams that we were sequestered, the defendant stood up and confessed, and something else too, but I can’t remember. They were all separate dreams too. Ugh.

Fej

Sick Cats and Nose Piercings

I lazily bowed out of making breakfast this morning. We had a leisurely brunch and so that took care of lunch too. I let the kids romp around the house for a while after that. My younger daughter had plans to bring a friend over to her mom’s house so she was over there.

One of my cats has been acting oddly lately. First it was extra loud and pronounced meowing and then over the last few days he has hadn’t any voice at all. I didn’t really mind… I decided I should probably take him into the walk in vet that is open on the weekends. Four hours, cat vomit on my seats, cat poop on my carpet, and $140 later we are back. They weren’t 100% what was wrong with my cat but they felt pretty comfortable that it had to do with a urinal tract problem. I am 100% sure that this cat does not travel in cars well. I stuffed him into the cat carrier at first where he proceeded to completely freak out jump around. He seemed to do great when we let him out and he just wondered around eventually settling down. Then as I put the car in park he pukes all over the back seat. I do love leather seats though. He didn’t puke on the way back but I did find droppings all over the back floor area. Luckily they were pretty easy to collect.

He doesn’t like the new and expensive cat food and squirting the antibiotics down his throat is about as much fun as cleaning up his vomit.


I guess my wife pierced her nose tonight. On her own. I’ve known plenty of people who’ve done that actually, back in high school. After I got off the phone my oldest daughter asks me who pierced their nose. I told her that it was her mom. I turned back to the road but then noticed her banging her head on the armrest of the chair. She couldn’t believe her mom did that and mumbled something like, “I don’t believe it...” I just love my oldest daughter and her conservative ways, oh please oh please let her stay like this.

Fej

Movies and Way Too Much Food.

If I were to list the top 100 movies I’d let my children see, “Alien vs. Predator” ranks somewhere on a totally different list, because I obviously would not let them watch it. I had a pretty good idea where they saw the movie but as I was verbally abusing their mother’s knowledge of the CARA they said it wasn’t their mom’s fault. It was their aunt (my sister-in-law) who in fact put the movie on. I switched my anger towards her and asked how they had time to watch that movie as they had only been there for about a half-hour this afternoon. That’s because it was their aunt who went to their mother’s house and then insisted on watching the movie.

So, now I’m back to cursing (in my own head of course) both women. This crap really gets me mad and I’m going to talk to both of them about it. I don’t really care what a crappy mother they have, that’s no excuse to carry on the tradition to my children, at least not as long as I’m involved.


Our panel has now reached the status of “unusual” according to both our bailiff and our panelist bailiff as well. On top of the leftover’s we already have building up, a full course of Green Chile stew and homemade tortillas, another bag of candy, and a bucket full of more homemade cookies were brought in today. I think I’m just going to stop eating breakfast, I might stop bringing lunch too.

I haven’t drank this much coffee since I was working 50 hours a week and attending 15 hours worth of classes trying to finish my degree. I think it’s starting to work opposite of its original intended purpose though and actually making me tired. There was a point in my life where I could drink two or three cups of coffee and go right to sleep afterwards. I don’t think I’m quite there yet but it brings back memories.


Fej

Sick Kids, Cookies, and Reality.

My oldest woke up this morning complaining of her stomach hurting and not feeling well. I’m quite familiar with her typical “I don’t want to go to school” routine but she rarely pushes it and claims she is sick with any real conviction. I did a three kid fever test and concluded that indeed, the oldest of my three had a warmer forehead than the other two.

I need to buy a stinking thermometer.

Anyhow, I took her to my mom’s instead of school and literally had to pull up to the little one’s school and toss them out. I was late for jury duty but luckily they weren’t lined up waiting for me.

I asked my mom to make cookies for my jury panel and she obliged that day. Yes, I do have the best mom in the world. I think my panel realizes this too, the cookies are damn good. I thought about claiming that I made them myself but I think they already know me well enough that no one would have believed me anyway.

I’ve only had the, “No, my wife and I are going through a divorce.” talk with about three of the other jurors so far. And each time, despite my efforts to ease the shock, I’ve left them standing there with “deer in the headlights” look. How could someone so young, with three kids, be going through a divorce? Hey, you brought it up, I just didn’t want to lie to you.

I hate this part. The story is so long and complicated that I kind of wish I could just lie to them. Tell them I’m happily married, the kids are fine, and some day maybe my wife will go back to work again. I just can’t though. As much as I hate to make people feel awkward about “assuming” certain things, sometimes it just can’t be avoided.

I hid for way too long, from myself and those I love... and loved. I will not hide from anyone anymore, no matter who asks and for whatever reason, well I’ll try really hard anyway.

Fej

Thanks to my jury duty:

1. I don’t have time to wave at the pretty bus driver. In order to get to court on time, I slow down a little, open the door and toss each kid out at the front steps just as soon as the cafeteria opens. They've learned to land on their backpacks and roll it out just about every time now.

2. I have to rely on the TV’s in the Jury break room for just a few minutes a day to get all of my current event information.

3. I’m already having dreams about the case...

4. I’m ingesting enough coffee everyday to keep a small third world country awake for a week. I can barely stay awake until the next break.

5. I know that most parking garages were not designed with extended 8 passenger vehicles in mind.

6. We ingest snacks, junk food, coffee, soda, large lunches and then sit all day long, and I still haven’t made it to my prepaid gym in over a month.

7. I know the proper technique for removing the scalp in order to view the skull.

8. Forget watching stock prices, I still have a full night of blogging to do you know!

9. Stay away from Mexican food, milk and certain veggies while on jury duty as a general courtesy to others.

10. There is no easy path you can take to get anywhere quickly when you start from downtown at 5:00 PM.

Panelist Fej

And More Civil Service

Things here in Fej land are no less eventfull than normal. But this jury duty stint really has me completely wrapped up right now. I desperately want to talk about it but I’m a good juror, really I am. So, today I found the best medium for venting my feelings and discussing the days events in court. I talk to myself, quite loudly, directly, with all of the emotion of a normal conversation (usually requiring more than one person). Do I do this at home, the restroom or somewhere else where privacy might be somewhat assured? Nope, I found it’s best to do this while driving. I worked out a lot of issues today and feel much more aligned with my concerns involving this case.

I have also found that if your talking to yourself is distracting to other drivers (I noticed a least a few people staring) just pop in your “hands free” device without plugging it into your mobile phone. You are then automatically off the hook for being accused of some sort of multiple personalities disorder.

Our panel was not given any incentive to quiet down today. In fact we found 2 dozen donuts waiting for us upstairs instead. That was completely counterproductive. Although, a donut and coffee in the afternoon does help.

I’ve managed to hold off mentioning her until now but sadly, the pretty panelist is indeed married. Of course I’m still not un-married but that’s not the point. I probably made enough glancing looks towards her prior to knowing her marital status that she is either paranoid or oddly curious. Anyway, now that I know she’s not available I get my courage and can talk to her just as freely as anyone else. I have issues with being single, major issues. Spending all this time downtown doesn’t help. There are so many very pretty women that work there. Sigh.

Fej

Our Rowdy Panel

We got in trouble for being too loud in the deliberation room again today. Everyone is getting along fine so far and we tend to get a bit too loud I guess during breaks and while waiting for court to resume again. Some of the women are bringing, apples, cookies and candy for snacks. The old men are constantly chattering, probably more than the women and certainly louder.

This led me to begin considering why are we being so loud and talkative? I even found my usual quiet self speaking up here and there today. Those of you who have served on trials involving difficult subjects and crimes can probably understand. I think it is the fact that we sit for hours on end listening to all the testimony, some of it quite traumatic, and then like I mentioned before you have to leave the court room and not speak of it to anyone.

I think it's that our talking freely, laughing, and letting loose a little really seems to help. It gets us “shoosed” by our bailiff, but I know we all feel a little bit better afterwards.

I can see why they shoosh us though too: Imagine sitting in the audience of the court, waiting for the trial to resume, and as the court room quiets down all you hear is the laughter of the jurors from the deliberation room. Then the door opens, we all walk out, with our coffee, tea, and water, our spirited conversations just ending as we slip out the door to our seats. It probably doesn’t look too good.


Fej

Ugh.

Another weekend flew by. Saturday went by pretty uneventfully up until about 7:15 PM. Then I get a call from my wife, she cheerfully asked me to see if the kids wanted to come over to her apartment for the night.

My oldest was playing basketball in the garage, the other two were jumping all over the house. They had made special “beds” of each of my two couches hours before and were more than a bit settled in for the night. I knew way before asking that they had no interest in spending the night with their mother. There she was on the phone though, plowing headfirst into disaster like always. I tried subtly, to prepare her but it didn’t help. I asked the kids (genuinely even, I didn’t try to bias in any way) and without any thought or hesitation they all gave it a resounding “no”.

I called her back and prepped her by saying that the kids were already settled in for the night, a little more notice and I’m sure it wouldn’t have been a problem. She went off the handle, not yelling or anything, but accused me of not sharing the kids and hung up. I gave her and myself a few minutes to collect our thoughts.

When I did call back I reminded her that the kids need a schedule, you can’t be yanking them out of their routines like it’s nothing. Not when a divorce is in progress anyway. I even went as far to say as that I thought she was ready to spend more time with the kids, we needed to start trying to figuring out how to divide our time with them more evenly. Did this help?

Nope, since I didn’t put my foot down, and drag the kids kicking and screaming over to her place last night, I obviously had no intentions of sharing the children. Today, I tried to arrange for her to take them for most of the day until our little Super Bowl party we had planned for this evening. She sulked, and said she had plans, and the third time I called back she said she would call me later. She did call later, just to my oldest though, and proceeded to cry about how much they hurt her last night by not coming over. Remember that my wife never spoke to them last night, they had no clue of course.

My god. I knew during all of our years of marriage that she had some child like tendencies but this incident pissed me off. I calmed myself down, and asked her to explain just exactly what she had told our daughter, even though I already knew. Whatever conversation she had the second time with my daughter worked, but damn. Just when you think, someone would never sink that low, they prove you wrong.

Fej

Here's a picture for tonight.

From the Inside...

The hardest thing about this trial and jury duty is sitting there for an hour or two, some of it involving extremely in depth testimony, and then we walk out unable to say a thing about it, to anyone.

While watching movies, live court TV, and even various stories I’ve read, it’s not the juries you typically hear about. It’s usually the lawyers, the defendants, the petitioners, and sometimes even the judge. The main reason is probably that in most live TV situations, it’s usually not allowable to film the jury. Beyond that it’s probably that the real story is behind the rest of the parties involved, not those people randomly selected because the can drive or vote.

It sure feels different being in the real thing. The entire court (the judge too) rises until we are seated. They stand until we leave. Everyone is constantly watching us, eyeing us, I’m sure wondering what we are thinking. We are huddled around the courthouse like a group of kindergartners on a field trip with our bailiff making sure no one gets lost. We even have our badges to make sure that if we are approached we can just point to our little round fashion accessory and walk away.

The most difficult part of all is the nature of this particular trial. It’s been over two years since the event we are considering happened. The various witnesses, the friends, and especially the family are the hardest to see. The parents of the deceased look like people with bodies in their late 40’s or early 50’s. Their faces however look easily 60 or 70, and I know they are not that old. The father can hardly sit through any of it, he is constantly breaking down and leaving the courtroom.

As for the 15 of us, we lost one today, we are an interesting group. We are quite diverse in age, sex, race and profession. I think it’s about 8 women and 7 men. A few “cliques” have already developed and for the most part we all get along fine. I only say for the most part because we won’t really know until the deliberations begin.

On a lighter side, we take the shorter breaks in the Juror room, the same room we will eventually be deliberating in. At first, I thought having two bathrooms in this one little room was a little over the top. Now I realize that as we all freely drink all the coffee, soda, and water they offer us, it takes just about the entire 15 minutes for everyone to take their turn.

One of the older guys popped his head out of one of the bathrooms this morning and asked, “So, do I leave the toilet seat up or down?”

Laughing really helps ease the tension.

Fej

Trial Update

I have so many things to talk about but very little that I am legally able to discuss.

For those of you who don’t remember or that haven’t been reading here long enough, I have a Political Science degree. My original plans were to become a lawyer. A whole bunch of other stuff like kids, marriage, call it what you want, happened somewhere in-between and I somehow ended up in engineering.

Man did I screw up. For jury duty we show up at 9:00 AM, get several breaks during the day, one and a half to two hour lunches and today we left at 4:30. This schedule was made for me!

On the other hand, we have to deal with some pretty serious topics, lots of pictures, and testimony from a myriad of sources. It’s pretty cool in a civic duty sort of way but I can see already that this is going to weigh very heavily on me.

Here is a link to a news story about the trial. No, I didn’t read it. Why believe me? Because honesty is what got my dumb ass on this trial in the first place, if you think I learned my lesson, no I didn’t. I’m still way too fair and impartial.

Fej

Voir Dire

It was a long day during jury selection. It turns out that indeed the jury selection process was today and not yesterday. We sat through several hours of questioning. I counted about 80-90 of us that had probably been narrowed down from the original 200. I kept expecting to be questioned about something in my questionnaire but I managed to get out of there without having to speak, well except for this:

“Your honor I have an important job interview tomorrow that I’d like to be excused for.”

“Uh, I already have a job. This would be for a new, better job.”

“Well, I’d really rather not but I suppose it’s possible I could ask them to reschedule, I’m just not sure how willing they will be to do so considering the length of this trial.”

That was it, so I figured I was pretty safe. So about mid afternoon they wrapped things up and we had to return to the Jury waiting room to wait for the announcement of who had been picked to serve the next three weeks on this murder trial.

You should have seen the looks and expressions on the faces of the jurors who had been selected. A few were kind of excited but most everyone else looked rather distraught. They lined up while everyone who hadn’t been picked filed past the jurors and exited the building. The people who had been excused all looked so relieved. I wish I were one of those people...

Yes, I was selected as a juror.

No, I won’t be attending my interview tomorrow.

Yes, my prospective employer was very understanding and said he had no problem rescheduling after the trial is over.

Yes, that’s an especially great thing because after being gone from my current employer for three weeks, they are sure to realize that they didn’t miss me all that much and will lay me off.

No, there is never a dull minute with me.


Fej