Last Chance
I’m in trouble because of my grass. It’s not my fault this time though. The moron who inspected my property mentioned that if I weren’t in compliance by the specified date, I’d get a second letter of warning.
Don’t tell me that. A second letter? That just means I have more time. Well, I got my second letter. If I don’t remove about 700 sq. ft. of grass by July 15th, I can be fined $500 a day and or be imprisoned for up to 15 days. Here is what I think: the law says you can plant high water turf on 20% of your net lot (total lot size minus any non-porous surfaces, i.e. concrete, foundation etc.) At the time, I interpreted the clause as to be 20% of my total lot. Oops. So. I figure, I can just break up my driveway and replace it with gravel. Good idea?
Okay, I suppose that idea is just spawned from my utter contempt for some municipal tweed that thinks my crappy lawn actually qualifies as grass. It’s foliage for sure but that is a generous description. My only consolation for being unable to keep my grass alive has been that it’s in the backyard and no one can see it. Not only did someone see it, but also this particular person has the audacity to point out that I’m violating city ordinances and basic lawn maintenance techniques as well. Like pouring weed & feed in an open wound.
What a bunch of crap. Guess what I’ll be doing this weekend?
Jeff
Don’t tell me that. A second letter? That just means I have more time. Well, I got my second letter. If I don’t remove about 700 sq. ft. of grass by July 15th, I can be fined $500 a day and or be imprisoned for up to 15 days. Here is what I think: the law says you can plant high water turf on 20% of your net lot (total lot size minus any non-porous surfaces, i.e. concrete, foundation etc.) At the time, I interpreted the clause as to be 20% of my total lot. Oops. So. I figure, I can just break up my driveway and replace it with gravel. Good idea?
Okay, I suppose that idea is just spawned from my utter contempt for some municipal tweed that thinks my crappy lawn actually qualifies as grass. It’s foliage for sure but that is a generous description. My only consolation for being unable to keep my grass alive has been that it’s in the backyard and no one can see it. Not only did someone see it, but also this particular person has the audacity to point out that I’m violating city ordinances and basic lawn maintenance techniques as well. Like pouring weed & feed in an open wound.
What a bunch of crap. Guess what I’ll be doing this weekend?
Jeff
posted by Fej at 8:28 PM
8 Comments:
poor babe!
Well at least when you take a break you can watch some crappy film or other... Maybe Constantine - it's not fantastic, but it's worth seeing for the Angel Gabriel and satan himself...
total complete crap. The city has nothing better to do, except look at grass. LOL. Happy breaking of the driveway.
Enjoy yourself. Are you sure it wouldn't be easier to just remove the gras and put gravel or something on it? Just a thought, but what do I know.
C
easy way to get rid of it....
You need 1 Jeep
put transfer case in LOW range
apply liberal amounts of throttle
soon, no more grass, just dirt
Vics, I'll have to check it out then, thanks.
C, I guess my breaking up the driveway idea is a little harsh.
LIKEINEEDTHIS, Hey I have 1 Jeep... and that sounds like a lot more fun than swinging a sledgehammer.
I'm thinking Like has it all figured out. The jeep way even sounds fun.
Well, not as fun as jumping off the room onto the trampoline!
PS. Home Depot will deliver gravel. I know this from all my renovation experience. Just a thought.
You are kidding me? That sounds like a bizarre regulation. I laughed when I read this. Bureaucraps with nothing better to do...
Think Astroturf.
Too much green is a problem? Is concrete better? dirt? wha? that's so bizzare.
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