Thursday, July 29, 2004

Vacation

Again, I'll be leaving the world of blogging, work, even the reach of mobile phones for a whole four days or so.  This time it was a little less planned but probably all the more needed.  I will not return to blog land until next Monday at the earliest. 

I'll be in the mountains the next four days, desperately trying to keep control of my children.  Not much different from a typical weekend, except longer and a whole lot more terrain for them to get lost in.

Have fun.

Fej.

Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Slushies

So, my kids are spouting off their usual 3-4 questions per minute overlapping each other by 10-15 seconds each and I’m just mildly sampling the conversation for profanity and inappropriate discussions.  Actually it’s not that bad and I answer most of their questions.

My oldest asks if we can make shushies at home and I of course say “no”.  Then without thinking I say out loud “Actually, I think we can.  We just need to blend ice and whatever drink you want.”  Big mistake.  I’ll probably have to learn how to rebuild blender motors soon and my icemaker is working overtime.  We’ve now made slushies from every drinkable fluid in our house with the exception of milk.  (My son suggested making Popsicle’s from chocolate milk and actually they weren’t that bad.) 

It’s reaching the point of annoying though, I just finished making apple juice shushies at 9:30 because they are smart enough to know that I don’t allow caffeine late at night.  I can’t wait until winter…
Fej.

Monday, July 26, 2004

Blog links

While I'm generally considered technically inclined, I'm not HTML inclined at all.  However, I have finally figured out on my own how to add a links section to my blog.  If anyone reads this stuff and wants me to link to their site, just let me know.  I'll do it just because I can and need the practice, for now. 

Fej.

FOXNews.com - Foxlife - Out There - Grandma Lulls Would-Be Robber to Sleep

FOXNews.com - Foxlife - Out There - Grandma Lulls Would-Be Robber to Sleep

The Grandma story is an interesting one of course, but the "Twenty Grand Goes Back to Rightful Owner" clip is what really caught my attention. These little rare occurrences give a little boost to my waning confidence in the human spirit. I think I could have done it (painfully and complaining the whole time about stupid people who do have money), but I'd definitely have take the $100 reward.

Fej.

Saturday, July 24, 2004


Shopping in China.

Some photo's from China. The first picture is a busy shopping street, the second is a view of Tianjin from my hotel window.

Nevermind about Friday night

So, instead of the quiet lonely evening at home I expected I didn’t roll into the house until after midnight.  My friend that I am on “different terms” with, well I decided to go out on a limb and see if he wanted to get a beer.  This was last minute and he didn’t even hesitate.  So, we departed from work and proceeded to go on one of my typical and unnecessary adventures.
 
I am adamant about only using money machines where I don’t get charged fees.  (I used to be really bad about not doing this.)  The money machine next to work was blocked by heavy traffic, so I figured I’d stop at the one closer to the bar.  During all of this wind and rain were uncharacteristically pounding our normally dry city.  The exit to my second money machine was also backed up so we proceeded to the next one.  There we also encountered heavy traffic and a previously non-existent river across a major intersection.  The desert soil does not absorb water readily, its porosity is low so when it does actually rain hard the water has no where to go.  We drove through a foot plus of water and after finding traffic at every turn decided that we had enough cash on hand to cover a few beers. 

We found a typically packed bar to have plenty of room and put down a few beers.  I should have figured, but calling it quits there was not what he had in mind.  Once I have a couple beers in me I’m also pretty easy to convince so we were off to the topless bar. 

(A quick side note: as I mentioned earlier I seem to have adventures everywhere I go.  A few months back, I found that the float in my gas tank was not functioning properly.  No more visual and audio indicators that you only have a couple gallons left, it runs out at just below a quarter tank.)

Having commented earlier that we would need to stop for gas was not enough to prevent running out on one of Albuquerque’s busiest streets.  (My tank is now empty at just over a quarter tank) Did I mention already that the rain was pouring down?  So, after a 2-block jog to and from the nearest gas station, we were back on the road (to the very same gas station I had just run to).  We stopped for cash and then pulled into the establishment. 

We (actually, my friend) had established rules for the evening.  I don’t remember the other 3 but “no VIP room” was mentioned.  This is never a problem for me for cash reasons among others.  I found our table empty after a trip to the restroom, and he was gone for a good hour.  He had been of course, in the VIP room.  I spent that time debating table dances vs. drinks.  Limited resources require careful consideration.  I mistakenly chose one or two too many dances over drinks and went home practically sober. 

Even if I had the cash, I don’t think I could drop it like I see so many other guys do.  There is the occasional beautiful woman, but she is there to make money no matter what she tells you.  It was easy to get taken in especially after a few drinks before, but nowadays I seem to be a little wiser, older, realistic, whatever it is I know they have no interest in anything but my money.  And that barely gets me in the door. 

So, because I had driven, I took him back to work to pick up his car.  I walked into a relatively quiet house minus the rather perturbed and hungry animals.   I spent more money than I’d have liked to, but all in all it wasn’t a bad night. 

Fej.

Thursday, July 22, 2004

Lame Friday night

That's correct, I'm already declaring tomorrow night as lame and it hasn't happened yet.  Still stranger, the kids are spending the night at grandma's tomorrow, I don't have to work late, I'm not completely broke, and I'm not traveling.  So why will it be lame?  Because I have only one good drinking friend.  Sure, there are the other faithful two - Myself and I, but I drink with them all the time.

This guy is way cool.  He doesn’t pressure me (or I him) to get blitzed or stay out beyond when our drinking cards are valid.  I guess I don’t need one anymore, but I don’t want him getting in too much trouble with his wife.  We get along very well even if months pass by between our outings.  My other buddy and I are how shall I say… on different terms lately.  That’s a whole other blog in itself, but we don’t go out anymore.  My other friend and coworker, is in China right now so it would be tough to meet for a drink.  I think we drank enough together to last a lifetime though, last time when we were both out there. 

So, what to do?  I suppose I’ll just go home to an oddly quiet house, clean a bit, drink a bit, blog a bit, and probably be asleep before I would if the kids were home.  I guess that doesn’t sound so bad, but for quickly approaching the point of being officially single, I’m sure not acting like it.  My wife on the other hand has her Thursday Tikki Bar nights and whatever else.  Actually, since she started working again (thank God…) that has cut into her partying.  Even then, she’s bartending so I guess she’s at the same place just on the other side of the bar.

At work, the rumors are flying as always but with a little more energy and substance than usual.  Our plant once peaked at 2700 people at one point and now we are somewhere below 200.  I feel like an ant running around in a rainstorm; sooner or later I’m going to get hit.  I’ve made it through so many layoffs I don’t count and I’m used to people saying “don’t worry, they’ll hand you the keys when it’s time to close the doors.”  I’m not so sure anymore.  I’d still be surprised but for the first time I think I could really be on the list.  I’m supposed to go back to China in August most likely but now I’m wondering if that could change too.  I don’t want to go, I’d rather go now but there isn’t a need to.  I’ll probably be leaving right when the kids start school.  They hate it when I go, and I do too.  Their teachers notice the difference when I’m gone.  On the one hand, that makes me feel pretty good.  I must be doing some things right.  On the other other hand, they are miserable for the most part and I feel like a loser for being gone, even if it’s my job.  I need to get a new job. 

Enough for now,

Fej.

Wednesday, July 21, 2004

Normal night

Tonight was nothing short of normal.  Actually, dinner was a bit different in that (sad, but at my kid’s request) we had a family dinner.  I do feed my kids on a regular basis.  It’s healthy, they’ve survived this long, but usually I’m a short order cook making everything from pancakes to quesadilla’s and serving them all in front of Cartoon Network on the coffee table.
 
So, I broke down and made them all eat the same thing at the table.  Now, I’m out of ideas because they are the pickiest children on the face of the earth and I’ve now served the one meal that they all like.
 
I’m confident my Jeep will sell this week.  I’ve lowered the price and I’m approaching being desperate.  Actually, I’m way past desperate, but to sell a family member it’s not easy.  Everyone who knows me well has actually gasped when I told him or her I was selling it.  They think I’m crazy, but I now realize that I’d be truly crazy to keep it.  It’s like an extension of me… I’ve laughed, loved, cried, bled, puked, and everything else I can think of with that Jeep.

My Dad once told me he had a 69 Mustang he bought brand new.  When I was old enough to appreciate it, he showed me a picture.  I wanted to pummel him for selling it at the time (because I wanted it) and his only reason was because I was on the “way”.  Now, many years later, I understand all too well.   I'm selling my Jeep well after my kids were on the "way", but it's still not easy. 

Fej.

Tuesday, July 20, 2004

TheNewMexicoChannel.com - News - Drunken Russian Flight Crew Beats Up Passenger

TheNewMexicoChannel.com - News - Drunken Russian Flight Crew Beats Up Passenger

And on this subject... Once you've realized that the crew is inebriated, don't you start to take advantage of them? I mean come on, at $5 a drink, Americans would be all over this scenario. Any rough housing by the crew and it would be a bunch of laid out flight attendants and free rounds on the house for the entire plane. What would the pilots care, they are locked up in the front anyway.

I thought Russians (Vodka drinkers) would be the first to not tolerate this sort of situation.


Fej.

TheNewMexicoChannel.com - News - Four Inmates Charged With Escape After Going On Beer Run

TheNewMexicoChannel.com - News - Four Inmates Charged With Escape After Going On Beer Run

I just love this. Not only did these guys get out once, but also they went out a second time to get more beer! How can you even punish these guys? They didn't break any laws (other than leaving prison), they paid for the beer, and they went back to jail. If I were working as a guard at this place, I'd be sweeping this under the rug and not going after these guys. A guard or supervisor needs to lose his or her job for this instead of having an inmate’s sentence extended.

Fej.

Fej.

Monday, July 19, 2004

Little Things

It’s the little things that really get to me.  People who know me will say that I am a very passive and understanding person.  People who know me well will say I demonstrate these traits to a fault.  Give me impatient and frustrating people, major life changing events, stress at work, and just about any other normally distressing event and I can wade right through it.  All right, I deal well, better than most people do at least.  Start tacking on the little normally incidental events and I seem to fall apart.

So, our soccer game started it all off.  We played very well over all but ended up losing anyway by 3 points.  We dominated the whole game, but couldn’t seem to score.  I was frustrated with myself for missing an easy shot.  Then that I felt I could have done more to stop a few of their goals while I was playing defense.  Normally not a big deal, but I was starting to get bugged.  
I forgot my sandals (again) so I had to wear my cleats for another hour of rounding up kids and driving home.  So, my feet are killing me. 
 
As my regular readers know (that would just be me) I’ve been trying to sell my Jeep for some time.  So, at McDonalds while in the drive through, a guy stops to ask about it.  He seems real interested, but of course he has to start asking me questions as I begin to order.  I try to rattle off a few perks but the drive through guy thinks I’m talking to him and the kids are shouting orders so I try to signal him to give me a minute but of course he’s gone once I’m done ordering.  Could he have just stopped 1 minute earlier or 1 minute later?  Oh well, I suppose that if he were really interested he’d have waited up. 
 
Then of course every little thing at that point was just salt in the wound.  The kids seem to know that when I need to relax and have some time to myself, do just the opposite.  No sooner was I in the house, but all 3 were in my room complaining, generally talking, or asking some odd ball question.  My dog and one of my cats joined in and I was pretty sure the walls were actually closing in at that point.  I just wanted to change my clothes, nothing else.  I know, I know, no big deal.  All it takes though is a little string of events like this to just really get under my skin.

I reminded the kids that they were starving just minutes ago and I did just buy them a supposed favorite food.  That distracted them temporarily.  I survived and they are asleep.  My Jeep hits the classifieds again tomorrow at a lower price.  My feet feel better.

I am on, wait… finished my second beer and it does help to write this stuff down. 

Fej.

Sunday, July 18, 2004

Nothin' much

How is everyone doing out there?  The sound of the many responses is truly deafening.  It was not a bad weekend by any measure, but I still venture into the new week with a little reserve and the nagging feeling that more could have been done. 
 
Personally, not too much has happened of recent.  Status Quo seems to be lingering, but that is not necessarily bad.  Change has been the word of the day for the last 2 years, so good or bad, no change almost feels good.  I'm still working on getting on my own two feet, work is always a challenge, and well... the kids are laughing like crazy right now at a silly movie.  It's way past bedtime for them, but how can I break that up?  They haven't argued for the remote, no blows have been given or received for at least an hour, and I officially announced the kitchen was closed at 10:00 PM.  A successful night by my definition. 
 
I haven't really come across anything to light me up like my previous post, then again I haven't read much news today.  Strange how I can let some things go despite their importance and then I go off on a tangent about tasers. 
 
Have a good night.
 
Fej.

Saturday, July 17, 2004

Tasers: A dangerouse alternative?

Let me get my thoughts in order, this is really getting me upset. 

Let's side with AI here and play out their argument: A technology (tasers) has been implemented across the US to non-lethally subdue would be offenders.  The primary claim (against their use) is that these devices can be used from a distance and leave little if any marks, which could allow them to become tools of abuse. 

Now let's side with reason:  (does this give away my position too soon?)  Police departments have implemented a non-lethal device across the country.  AI wants "to suspend the use of all Electro-shock weapons, including stun guns, stun shields and Tasers, pending the outcome of a vigorous, independent inquiry into the use and effects of such equipment. Such weapons can inflict severe pain without visible marks and therefore could be open to abuse. "

Let's look at their examples of abuse where police "appear" to use these tasers in unjustified situations: The main example in the article is the 15 year old girl who is eventually tasered after the bus driver calls the police because the teenagers were being unruly.  If you have read the article, does anything jump out at you in particular?  Let’s just jump over the little issue of a bus driver needing to flag down police officers because of the behavior of the kids on board.  Let’s also overlook that “Chiquita” verbally abused police officers and then resisted arrest.  Let’s also overlook that they didn’t resort to using batons or heaven forbid their firearms to protect themselves as opposed to a non-lethal device. 

I could go on for much longer than anyone would care to read about how we have reached the point where a bus driver fears for their life (or being sued for everything he or she is worth) and has to call police to help settle down school age kids.  AI conveniently overlooks any fault of the “child” in this case and uses it to their advantage. 

Okay, I’ll just get to my point.  Even AI admits that in the 3 cases where people have reportedly died from tasers, the deaths could have also been attributed to other factors.  So what’s the big deal?  Cops (good or bad) finally have an alternative weapon (as opposed to a 9mm) to use in a non-life threatening situation. 

Let’s again side with AI, and immediately ban this weapon and go back to the previous scenario of “let them go or shoot them dead”.  I think that realizing they have good intentions, AI should really reconsider their opinion on tasers and ban them after they have evidence that justifies doing so. 

Fej.

Here is another picture from our trip. Yes, now that I've found "Hello", I have an avenue to express my pathetic desires to be a photographer. When I have time and money, I'm sure photography will be the last thing on my mind, but I don't have time or money so here is a photograph.

Friday, July 16, 2004

Friday Night

Well, it's Friday night finally.  For a four-day week, it sure took forever to end.  At work, things finished up rather well.  I came up with a process that we might even try to patent.  To bad we don't have the nice IP dinners anymore, but it would be nice to finally get my name on a patent and not just a disclosure. 

If I suddenly seem to disappear from blog land, it's not because I'm the only one reading this stuff, it's because my fossil of a PC has finally decided to leave this world.  I had quite the struggle today despite a successful scandisk and defrag last night. 


So, after reading Jeff Shara's Rise to Rebellion, I've been on a kick to read about the revolutionary era.  I'm reading a biography about John Adam's and now I find myself more interested in his wife.  Holy crow, is Abigail Adams an amazing woman or what?  If I found a modern day version of her I'd turn to a spineless pile of goo right then and there.  Of course, that would totally disappoint her but I'd try to keep the puddle of goo thing to just to an initial reaction. 


For those of you somewhat familiar with her, she is not renowned for her looks.  Not to say that she was ugly by any means but her outstanding qualities that won friendship and affection of the likes of Thomas Jefferson and multiple other dignitaries of the time had nothing to do with her looks.  What does this say about me?  Apparently I've reached a point where I value a woman's intellect more than her appearance.  Don't believe for a minute that when a beautiful woman passes me by I won't slip and fall due to my own drool, but it's just an initial reaction.  I've been disappointed too many times, yet where initially I thought I was so fortunate.  I can think of several women where upon first glance, I had wished that I could only get to know her.  Then, I did get to know them (on a few occasions had the opportunity to do more) and found myself in the awkward position of realizing that their outward appearances could not make up for deficiencies inside. 


Don't think for a moment that I believe women can't be beautiful inside and out at the same time, but I am smart enough to realize that these women are going to be viscously sought after and difficult to find.  The one woman I've found that fits this description has eluded me by no efforts of her own for a long time.  Now that I could pursue her, I'm not sure she would want me.  I'm also not sure if I want her.  It's complicated, an entire blog of it's own....

So, I've gone on more than I should as usual.  I'm feeling better now, I guess everyone needs to wallow in his or her own mire at some point.  I'm not out of the bog just yet, but I've got a good view of where I need to go.  It will not be a path void of obstacles or obstructions, but if it were an easy road, the trip itself would not be worth of mention and little would be learned.

 
Fej.

Thursday, July 15, 2004


This was a shot of the kids on a foggy day enjoying the beach despite the cold. When you live in the desert, any day at the beach is a good one.

Wednesday, July 14, 2004

Not much to talk about

I've been having a tough time lately coming up with stuff to talk about. The news is certainly not boring but I guess I'm just not up to remarking about anything right now.

This is all a drag to read about I'm sure, but it seems to help me to talk about it. There are so many other things I could be focusing on right now; it's just depressing to not feel like doing anything. I feel like I have a pretty good handle on the issues that are bringing me down, but understanding what is wrong is just a step. I want to move on... with a lot of things in my life right now. It seems like everything is working against me, but I suppose that's a common feeling when you are down.


I think I'm just looking forward to the weekend right now. To want time to fly by just so you can get past something, or to wish it was weeks later from now... It just seems wrong to wish your own life away because of some speed bumps. Okay, they are pretty big speed bumps but if you hit enough of them, eventually you know exactly how fast to take them and then they don't seem so bad.

That last paragraph really emphasizes that I need to just go to bed.



Fej.

Tuesday, July 13, 2004


Lighthouse in Nova Scotia.

Monday, July 12, 2004

Back home

We all made it back today after a very long return trip. 8 hours by three planes, 5 hours sleep in a hotel, 4 hours driving, and 12 hours by ferry (all in reverse order) and we made it home. The kids did great but were definitely tired and ready to get back home. I made it a full 7 days without Internet, email, and no access to voicemail. I didn't even miss it when I thought about it.

I needed a break, but it wasn't a stress free trip by any means. The important thing is that we got to visit my grandmother and all the kids really enjoyed it.

I'll be back to myself here soon, but now I need to sleep.


Fej.

Sunday, July 04, 2004

Vacation

Tomorrow we take off to Nova Scotia. The kids are more ready than I am. I of course am plagued by the worries that I leave behind and the ones I am sure to encounter. Financially, I’m not secure; I really needed to sell my Jeep before I left. That did not happen but I hope we’ll somehow manage. I think it will all work out, but it would be nice to take a vacation one day and not worry about all the crap that you aren’t supposed to worry about while on vacation.

My wife (soon to be ex) is having mixed feelings about not going. She initially said she wanted to go, but because of money reasons I didn’t buy a ticket for her right away. I had good reason to figure she might not go anyway. Then when I finally did offer to get her a ticket she decided not to go. To explain this in depth would not be appropriate here, that will take much more time. It’s been long enough since we separated that the kids don’t really question it much. I’m torn whether or not I want her to come along. She would be a lot of help with organizing and remembering my relative’s names, I really suck at that. Then again, the discomforts, embarrassment, and awkwardness that would plague us both would really detract from the trip. It’s probably best this way, but it still feels really weird. The last thing I want to do is to get back together with her. Divorce is not what I want, but it’s the only solution that I can see.

Anyway, I’ll be going 7 days or so without Internet or email. That will be difficult. For those of you who actually read up on what I am writing, thank you. I’ll be back at it in a week or so.

Friday, July 02, 2004

Just a couple more days

We leave for Nova Scotia in just a couple days, and of course I'm no where near ready. I'm still a bit stressed out that I haven't had any success selling my Jeep. I had really wanted some extra cash for the trip. This has been the only real thorn in my side lately. It's been like 4th child to me for a long time and just deciding to sell it was physically painful. Now I can't seem to sell it.

I will be away from the Internet and email for 6 days straight. This will be a record and a good test to see how attached I really am. Work will pile up, but that is a good thing right now. I'll probably have to go to China again in August, so I at least made it a full 2 months at home, well not traveling for work anyway.


Fej.

Thursday, July 01, 2004

FOXNews.com - U.S. & World - Black Children Denied IQ Tests in California

FOXNews.com - U.S. & World - Black Children Denied IQ Tests in California

This would be a prime example of how Affirmative Action has passed the point of being helpful and must be phased out. It had its place, time, and effectiveness, but anything from here (even a several years ago) and beyond it will only hold the wrong people back. Programs like this take years to show any progress at all and need to be scaled back a few years before every goal is met. It's just like cutting interest rates, the market (people) react immediately at the announcement, but it takes months to see the real ramifications.

Fej.